How to Quit (and still have a reference)

You are going to quit. Why? Is it because:

-You hate your job?
-You hate your co-workers?
-You hate your boss?
-You hate your location?
-You hate the company?
-You need more money?
-You found a better job?
-You can't stand your customers?
-You found your calling?
-You have a morality issue?
-You don't have a morality issue?
-You broke up with a co-worker?
-Any other reason?

First things first: don't tell your co-workers. You can tell them, but just don't discuss it with them. Nothing you say will remain as you said it, so you saying, "I broke up with Jared," will turn into, "Jared beats me." No kidding, it will get that misconstrued.

After you have that down, make sure you never get angry. With anyone. Keep smiling and nodding as if you were trying to keep your job, just as before, so that no one will remember you as short-tempered. These last few days are going to be what they remember. So if you slack off, you will be thought of as lazy. If you leave early, that is how you will be characterized. And worse yet, you may just be rumored as having been fired.

As much as you want to, do not go crazy. Don't moon your boss. Don't walk out on a busy shift. Don't quit by text message (*cough*)...just don't. Walk up to your boss and inform him'er that you are putting in your two weeks. If you can't do two whole weeks, give them as much time as possible. Keep everything as civil as possible.

You will probably be asked as to why you are quitting. You can be honest (as long as its a rational reason to quit), but be nice. Do not say, "You are a sucky manager." Say, "I cannot cope with your managerial techniques, even after having open discussions with you and your superiors." Have you not had said discussions? Are you sure you want to just up and quit?

That brings me to my next point: No place is going to be perfect. Don't quit an otherwise awesome job because there aren't enough ways the employees are thanked. Try to talk to your manager (or whoever is in charge of morale) and suggest something. If they don't go for it, take initiative. Worse comes to worse, you have that as an excuse for quitting that makes you sound indispensable.

If you take enough care, your ex-boss can become an advocate instead of an enemy.
Happy quitting!